Elsewhere, he pounds a xenomorph’s giant testicles like a boxing speed bag. Duke kicks an alien eye through a set of goalposts for a gruesome field goal at one point. But if such armament isn’t available, he can hurl trash cans or golden statuettes in the invaders’ direction-or just bludgeon them with his fists, particularly if he pops a handful of steroids and goes into what the game calls “‘roid rage” Another example of chemical “enhancement”: Beer makes Duke tougher at the cost of blurring his vision.īlood and body parts fly around like plastic grocery bags on a windy day. It takes hard work to slog through the game, the storyline of which again revolves around mowing down an alien army, this time in Las Vegas.ĭuke can slay aliens with an assortment of eviscerating terrestrial and extraterrestrial weapons. Indeed, gameplay is not only crass and gross (more on that in a minute), but tedious. “There’s one problem: It forgot the fun part. “It’s supposed to be simple, raunchy, over-the-top fun,” writes USA Today’s Brett Molina. And the result is, fittingly, much like a zombie itself: It’s slow, dumb and stinks.ĭuke Nukem Forever has received some scathing reviews from secular game critics, with many calling out its interminably long load screens and dated sense of humor. Like an unholy zombie, Nukem began scratching his way out of his gaming grave last year, finally shambling into big-box stores in 2011. So when Nukem development company 3D Realms was shuttered in 2009, it appeared as if the Duke had shot his last alien and received his last lap dance.
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So much so that the phantom title earned Wired’s Vaporware Award six years running (vaporware being a term for promised hardware or software that’s never delivered). In his continuing quest to make the franchise (including its requisite strippers) as realistic as possible, game designer George Broussard kept tinkering with it until most folks assumed it’d never be released-something like the video game equivalent of Guns N’ Roses’ mythic Chinese Democracy. The following year, the inevitable sequel was announced.īut the game became a victim of its own success, according to Wired magazine. But that didn’t keep the game from selling 3.5 million copies. No surprise that Duke Nukem 3D received its own volley of defcon-level crit for promoting pornography and murder. In addition, that game also allowed players the ability to shoot innocent women. When he wasn’t bashing E.T.’s brains out, Duke was dashing through porn shops and encouraging strippers to perform for him. But Duke’s career really began heating up with Duke Nukem 3D, a massively successful 1996 release that pitted the protagonist against a marauding horde of extraterrestrials determined to take over Los Angeles. And more urinal using. Among other things.ĭuke first strode into gamers’ lives back in 1991 as a side-scrolling platformer, cutting through aggressive aliens as if they were Jell-O jigglers left out on a Florida front porch. After 15 years-a veritable eternity in the gaming universe-Duke Nukem is back.
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